kid to Father. Father to kid. →

paigrowingup:

“God spoke to me in the car. I wept. It can’t be the same anymore.” 

P: But it’s just money! It’s just a car, a ring, a house. I don’t get why it’s that hard. These things all pass away, right? A brand new car today, a wreck of metal tomorrow. A house now, rubble later. 

P: But God, that’s my car. That’s my future marriage on the line. I want to design my own house and pimp it out to the max. It’s gonna be all rectangles. None of this parametricism nonsense. 

P: Okay wait, wait, wait. You don’t understand. I might not need to design my own house….but…I kind of need a car. 

P: ….Not even a car? Could you just. Could you just slow down a little bit here? What about future husband Pai!!??!?!?!!?!?!??! Not him too? 

P: For your own glory, geez! How could you be doing this? If I have nothing left, how can I be bringing you glory? I think you’ve gone too far. Those things were mine. You had no right. 

P: There. I said it. 

P: …

P: Even now, you won’t answer? 

My glory. Oh my child, what do you know about my glory? I don’t need you to have a car, a house, a husband for you to bring me glory. You’re my daughter. Whether you realize it or not, you bear my likeness. The very fact that you’re my daughter brings me glory. I don’t need your worldly success, your refined speech, your straight As. Can’t you see that I just want you? Not part of you, not most of you—all of you? Your broken and smushy heart is beautiful in my hands. I love you even before I begin to mold you. 

It hurts, doesn’t it? I watched you proudly build up your wealth, your relationships, your reputation, and you stood back and called it yours, with such delight in your eyes and it hurt me to take it all away, but I don’t want Pai + car, house, architect label, husband! I just want you. I made you out of dust and I, the I AM, call you Mine—present tense. You are mine. But oh my dear daughter, you run away so quickly.

I know what it feels like. And I’m beckoning you to come as you are and give it all up—yes, I am asking this of you. But every path I take you on, I’ve been there first, blazing the trail for you. Follow it to the cross. That’s where I gave it all, just like you will. My Son gave it all for you. 

Dear “Mine”,

There’s a chair here for you. I’d like my child, my dear sheep, my precious redeemed daughter to come home. There’s only one chair…and I’m afraid it’s not big enough to fit you and the things closest to your heart. Come as you are. I love you a whole lot more than you’ll ever be able to understand.

P: I miss him.

I know.

P: It’s really, really, really really hard. You’re putting me in a lot of places right now.

You know why.

P: Yeah.

P: Hey…

P: I know that you’ve been waiting a while. I’m late. I know that I promised to be here earlier. 

P: I got stuck in traffic though. A lot of it. 

P: If the offer is still on the table…could I sit down?

You’re finally here! How do you feel? 

P: Really, really full. Like my heart is expanding with something I can’t see.

Because I’m giving you something that will complete you more than that, her, or him, or that other thing ever will. Can you guess what it is?

P: …Love?

Exactly! I’m giving you Me.  

The part about the future husband really hit me hard, except future wife for me. But definitely very true. In the end, all these things, including our relationships will pass. God is the eternal joy and satisfaction of our soul. I just need to be reminded of that and believe that more. Oh Lord, help my unbelief!